last days of summer

Well as I look over my planner I realize that this is basically my last week of summer at home. Next week me and my family will go to Colorado, where I plan to have an extremely enjoyable week -engaging in activities far from my normal routine, admiring the majesty of the mountains, and having some good QT with the family. I cant believe that I have almost been a college graduate for a year! WHERE has the time gone?

Answering that question, where has the time gone-isn't it weird when there are times you can look back and its like you did a million and one things, and then there are other times when you can't seem to remember anything significant but you know you remember being busy. Goodness I do not like that word busy, but it seems to follow me everywhere I go. Its the thing that I feel guilty if I'm not but trapped if I am. Rationally I know that is ridiculous, but then again not everything is rational.

Recently I have been challenged to do a few different things that I thought seemed easy and silly, but turned out to be a much harder task than expected. One of the things was to make a timeline of my life, a life line more or less with every memory I could remember and then write them in the area of time they happened in, and where they ranked/effected me. Im thinking oh dear-Ill need a roll of butcher paper for this little task, but I was wrong. When I actually sat down to do this it proved to be much harder than expected. Years when I knew lots of important, exciting, or even devastating things happened I could only remember a few things. I remembered big things like the hurricane evacuation or winning an award-but the everyday things that shape your character sure are hard to remember. When discussing this later with the person who challenged me I suddenly had a gush of memories of things I needed to add-and they laughed and said, you don't remember-- because you were busy. That tiny little phrase 'because you were busy' has caused some mental controversy since this little chat. I enjoyed all those days of constant activity, being involved in every aspect possible, but did I miss something along the way? As I prepare for teaching school in just a month, I wonder, what kind of influence do I want to make or atleast attempt to make on these young forming minds? Opportunity comes with responsibility, am I ready to rise to the occassion?

The other challenge that was extended to me I knew would be harder. As you know, I am a planner and have a tendency to not enjoy the "flexes" of life. I like a plan/chart/schedule and I want it to go the way it has been laid out. When I am forced to change plans I often react in a poor attitude that effects not only me but the others around me as well. Ohh, so back to the challenge-I have to sit in my car for 2 minutes before putting it into gear everytime I drive somewhere for a week. I am not limited to what I can do with those 2 minutes, and its not like they would know if I cheated I suppose, but I can't cheat. As I embark on my 6th day, these 2 minutes now are scheduled in. I know that when I leave my house I have 2 minutes, when I leave wherever I parked I have 2 minutes and so on. TWO MINUTES-what a tiny fraction of time that has created a sense of urgency. How many times do we take something so insignificant and focus on it, causing a false sense of urgency. I realize the point of this challenge is to help me learn to be flexible and realize that tiny bumps in the road are out of my control and to not let it effect me negatively. To learn that people are more important than schedules, and sometimes a sacrifice here will result in a blessing there.

In closing, I am excited, scared and a little confused as to what the next sliver of my schedule will look like. As I have decisions to make, kids to show love to, and every day meaningless tasks to partake in I will work on flexing....well hopefully..haha..if you're like me, you know its something that will take a proactive attitude to change it.

"It occurs to me it is not so much the aim of the devil to lure me in with evil as it is to preoccupy me with the meaningless."-Donald Miller

until next time...

First Day of Summer!

Well happy first day of summer-the longest day of the year!

I haven't blogged recently, and today while I was on the gazelle I was thinking about some things I felt like writing about. Funny thing about a blog is-you dont know if someone is reading it or not--but an audience isn't my priority-just think its fun.

Well week before last I was in NOLA on the Mission Trip with FBCP's youth group. This was my first trip to be the "adult" which was a little bit of a change of pace, because I have grown up in that church and know everyone and vice versa. So when I was asked to drive the van or kids asked me if they could stay up late my primary response was..uhh ask someone who's in charge?! HAH. It was a good trip-definitely one of the first times that I had a concrete example of why I was where I was ---and how God used me. That was a humbling experience. I had a camper in my group who is a Type 1 Diabetic on a pump, very similar to mine. While we were there-guess what-my pump retired, yep you guessed it-just died. So while I was trying to control my inner hysteria, God provided. By the next afternoon I was back in business, with a pump overnighted to me! :) But that 24 hour period that I was pumpless, I had to go back old school--injections-yuck!!...Here's 'AHH HA!' moment. The girl I mentioned previously, the other type 1'r had a minor emergency and had my pump not broken the day before I wouldnt have had the supplies we needed. Her mother would have been flying out ASAP, we'd be making a trip to the hospital, and who knows what all else we would have inquired along the way. Talk about being in the right place at the right time. I have prayed over the past almost 3 years, that God would be able to use my disease as a ministry, and give me understanding to many of the 'whys?' I have encountered along the way. Anyways, it was like God said-you say you're a visual learner, you want to know why?--HERE YOU GO! In that instance I have never been so thankful to be "hooked up", have syringes, remember all the countless articles I have read, and accumulation of knowledge-because I was the instrument. What a blessing to be used!!!

As far as work goes-I had my first teacher workshop last week. The nerd in me loved it-learning teaching techniques, visual examples, hands on manipulatives and all kinds of stuff. Im not saying all day every day was my ideal way to spend a week of summer-but I am saying that it was very interesting, and I am excited to use the new tools I have been taught!!

What else....

The quality of faithfulness has been on my mind lately-from something as tangible as a faithful friend or faithful medical equipment-to recent lessons in Scripture about Ruth and Joseph. In both cases they didn't have the ideal circumstances their whole life, but they were blessed beyond measure for their faithfulness to God. Although I cant imagine being sold by my siblings or having my spouse die and moving to a foreign country-their lives are remarkable to me. How often do we pity ourselves for not having what someone else has? I know I am just as guilty as the next person but-I am reminded that if we will wait-God's blessing is so much better than what we could do on our own. Obviously easier said than done-but gosh those reminders are so convicting and encouraging.

Well for now thats all I can remember that I wanted to write, I know there was more-but I cant remember.

Until next time :)

long time no see

Well, Im back. It's been a while, but nice to see you again :)

Alright lets have a mini-update on whats going on--I have officially accepted a job in Deer Park ISD, teaching junior high math! Before you start to grumble and complain and feel sorry for me-or wonder what in the world I was thinking...let me tell you I would have thought the same thing a year ago. Over the past year with so many changes, the world of teaching has been introduced to me in a different light. I have basically subbed the entire school year, and have loved it. I got my alternative certification and I am totally looking forward to next school year. I know it will be hard and a challenge-but I love a challenge-and I know this is where I need to be which is a delightful feeling.

I am looking forward to still having summers that is for sure! Starting with this one :)

lets see..what else..I still live at home, still love my dog, and still would like to know what youre up to!!

until then :)

Im a year older

Well lets think of everything that has changed since I wrote last time...

I had a birthday, I am 22 now, which is nothing monumental just another day with cupcakes and a bouncy obstacle course-no big-but big fun.

I am still teaching that long-term class I was in last time I wrote, I have been there like 7 or 8 weeks-somewhere around there, somedays are harder than others-but I am most definitely learning and loving it.

The Lord is doing work in me--loving me, stretching me, and teaching me to fly.

Once again, I never cease to be amazed at the timing of the Lord, amazing what happens when you have a little faith. I am being reminded that when we are consistently in the Word, God will provide an encouraging pat on the back, right when we need it.

I also have realized how important my 'girls' are. My 3 best friends that every day I realize how valuable they are-their encouragement, accountability, and unconditional love are something that very few people are blessed with. I am happy to say I am one of them...

I continue to have somewhat of a battle with the idea of balance. Which I think is something I will have a life long struggle with-but I guess as long as I know it exists I can focus on not letting it take over.

For now-that is all-nothing too crazy or exciting-I will try to combat the next blog with something humerous..

until then :)